July 24th 2004
There’s a lot to write about. Briefly:
• Violence in the college the day before yesterday. Usual folks involved. BA vs BSc. Yesterday they sough revenge and the police came in. will explain later
• Yesterday I spoke my mind to my best friend and did some sort of counselling
• A friend thinks I’m now at the pinnacle of my life. If this is the pinnacle then what is non pinnacle? Actually she’s right in a way-better than I was!
Sleepy now ….
July 25th 2004
There are so many times when I want to write so many things in you. But I just don’t. Never mind why, so many thoughts feelings and ideas go unrecorded, unremembered. I wonder if memory does need external aids like diaries. Why can’t I remember my own life without photographs and written accounts? Nowadays somehow I don’t feel like elaborating. Once something is over it’s over and I lose interest. What seems to be the most exciting thing on earth seems dull and drab the next moment!
4th August 2004
I can write at leisure now, only I might ruin my eyes because I’m in a dark bedroom with the light from the hall to illuminate this page. There was lots to say but sanding in the toilet and writing was far too uncomfortable.
Was supposed to be in college by nine but went a bit late. French Sir asked me my marks thinking they’d be pathetic since I’d missed so many of his classes. Well when I said 40/40 he sure was surprised. I had anyways pretended I didn’t know French and never let on that I actually learnt some more too.
In the sociology class, yesterday’s debate about ethnocentrism was apparently forgotten. I didn’t bring it up either. Some friends played the fool as usual. Tej and I then went on a Navika hunt and found her in the basketball court. We wanted her to do the presentation for the GD.
In the psychology class ma’am was on Gestalt and perception. Since I’d read it I contributed quite a bit and as usual she didn’t want me to. But nobody else did and I was bored so I spoke. So anyways, she asked me once again if I was an only child or a younger child. I guess that’s what she’d been…the other day she tells me to my goddam face that she thinks I’m irresponsible and that she saw my mother and thought she was very responsible and that I looked just like my mother. Every goddam class she asks me if I’m an only child. So when I told her “spoilt child” she agreed like it was the most evident fact of life. I most certainly do not think I’m a spoilt child. At least I’m not narrow minded self- centred and bad at communication. I mean, I thought feeling insecure was my forte until I met her!
Prathiksha came in the middle of the class and we went to invite VP and other Sirs arrange chairs etc.
Then the GD. Boy was it fun today. One girl went on and on about how ragging is sinister and another boy went off fulltoo extreme about how if you rag they commit suicide. And this other guy kept saying weird funny things and called someone a feminist and someone else a communist. This set off another debate at a tangent.
Sir came in and changed the discussion a bit and made us focus a bit more on the topic. The whole thing was very funny. It’s on reservations next week.
Went to French class-uneventful except that I saw French sir who was in a meeting there peep out and he recognised me too.
When I came back home my friend taught me how to chat on the net. Can you believe it, I didn’t know how to until now. Anyways while I was chatting another friend called and I had to concentrate on the chat as well. She probably thought I wasn’t happy to talk to her. I should have told one of them to wait.